Silence

Silent monkey photo by Thousan on Flickr

Silence…. a theme that keeps popping up in my mind, how many times have you asked for shhhhhh, thought about the silent gaps in time, watched and thought about the application of silence as a tool….. thought about the process of Monkey Mind and it’s constant chatter, chased silence, endured silence, loved silence, avoided silence… then this question always emerges.

Silence

Why are you afraid
of the gentle caressing
sound of pure silence ?

A…… Day

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A day of meaning,
and a day of menace.
A day of cultural arrival,
and cultural denial.
A day of celebration,
and a day of decimation.

A day to unite,
that also divides.
Where history is spun,
we are many, but one.
When much of a brief history is spoken,
yet the history of thousands of years is forsaken.

One boat people denying others,
opportunity to join us as sisters and brothers.
When “patriots” drink and brag,
wrapped in the symbolism of a flag,
that carries the flag of another nation,
the seven pointed star of federation,
and the great emblem of the Southern Cross,
that many have tattooed into their skin, embossed.

YES, let’s celebrate this great southern land,
the glorious gift, temporarily held in our hands,
but let us do it so that every day,
for ALL our people, really is Australia Day.

Interests

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Business interests,
Banks interests,
Retail interests,
Industry interests,
Mining interests,
Economic interests,
Governments interests,
Department interests,
Companies interests.
but who is governing for yours or my bloody interests?

Always ask in whose interest?
But, to do so YOU must be interested,
Sure, be disaffected, disappointed,
hold them in disdain, or wish they were all arrested,
but you cannot afford disinterest.

Open your eyes, your ears, your heart and your mind,
look beyond the impress of main stream press,
you might just find that there is plenty of interest,
in whose interests
are being served, by those who proclaim an interest
in your interests,
while making interest
out of your disinterest.

Show your distress, make a noise,
write an email, a letter or post,
stand up, hit the street, protest.
Never lose sight, of yours, your mates,
your neighbours, your communities interests.

Think,take time, give time, help redress,
the imbalance of interests.
Deciding who will govern best,
before you cast your vote, put it through this test.
Whose interests,
will they serve best?

Then take your vote, and invest
in those that will serve the whole of your communities interests,
not just the narrow power or profit interests
of those who previously made their interest
out of your disinterest.

Be interested in interests!

An eternity one second at a time.

As another new year approaches, I could give you tips about making new years resolutions, or give you more tips on how to guarantee you fail at those resolutions… but this year I want to focus on presence.

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An eternity one second at a time

The sweeping
ticking
second-hand,
marking
the
steady
passing
of time.

Eight
Six
Four
Zero
Zero
times
a day.

Each tic
pregnant
with
promise
or pain.

Each
tic
a potential
beginning
or end.

Each tic
separated
by silence.

A brief
emblem
of the
infinite
nature
of time
yet
impermanent
nature
of being.

Each
tic
providing
a place
to panic
or
a place
to rest.

My wish for your new year and mine

For your new year I hope that each of those brief silences is an opportunity to rest, not panic. If troubles do befall you, I hope that you can learn to sit with your sadness and rest in the silence, and that you are surrounded by people who will help you to be resilient and deal with whatever the circumstances are. Overall, I hope that the new year is one of happiness for you and your family and friends.

I want to remind you of the gifts mentioned in my xmas post

To your enemy, forgiveness. To an opponent, tolerance. To a friend, your heart. To a customer, service. To all, charity. To every child, an example, and to yourself, respect.

I’ll be concentrating on being more present in each and every moment and trying to give these gifts throughout the year….. what will you be doing?

That day finally came

Samuel_headshotUpdating Samuels picture..

In the last post I talked about our circumstances and how they felt like being in Limbo. As a family we have bent and bent.. but in some respects we can bend no more.

I have talked about looking for the fire in Samuel’s eyes, the hope of where there is a spark and the degree of difficulty about some of the questions we knew were coming at some point. As I said in one of the other posts I have had an uneasy feeling throughout Samuel’s admission and in many ways we all knew, at least intellectually, that the day was approaching where some tough decisions would need to be made.

Samuel has dictated that those decisions (or at least the first of them) needed to be made today, knowing it was coming intellectually is still no preparation for the reality and the emotion that hits you when the decisions actually need to be made.

Our incredible teams of doctors

My family will be eternally grateful for the care and guidance that many teams at the Childrens Hospital at Westmead have provided us. Care and guidance that have allowed us to give Samuel the best possible quality of life over the past almost seven years since his accident. That care and guidance continued today with Samuel’s pediatrician taking a big chunk of time to sit with Jo-ann and myself and talk through everything that has happened and to spell out his concerns about the capacity to continue to give Samuel a meaningful quality of life and the very real indicators that Samuel has very little fight left to give, along with his wish to continue to do the right thing by Samuel and us as a family.

I have no doubt that the conversation we had this morning is one of the hardest that a doctor ever has to have, but in his usual fashion Samuel’s main doctor did it in the most caring and respectful way humanly possible.

That conversation was the first a few very tough ones necessary throughout today to beginn to layout the plan to make Samuel’s last days as special as they can possibly be, to make sure that he remains as comfortable as possible and that he is always surrounded by his family and people that love him.

What does the plan look like?

Part of that plan is to stay at the Children’s Hospital at Westmead for the next few days while the first steps and changes to Samuel’s care plan are made, and then to move over to Bear Cottage.

The Bear Cottage team has been involved in helping to look after Samuel and the rest of the family over the past few years. They have  provided us much-needed respite and pampering from time to time. It is a warm, welcoming and incredibly friendly place where we will be surrounded by a team of staff that know Samuel and the family well and with whom we have discussed many things about Samuel over the years. We will also be with other families who are at various stages of the journey we have been on with Samuel. We know that the Bear Cottage team will help us make Samuel’s last days as special as they can possibly be.

Sharing the news

There is no right or easy way to talk to your children about the coming death of their sibling. Jo-ann and I are lucky to have two beautiful compassionate young women who love Samuel unflinchingly and unfailingly. Sharing the ongoing changes with them, and then getting home and sitting down with them both to have a very long chat about Samuel and what the coming days may mean was made as easy as it could be by their maturity beyond their years, and their ability to be open and honest about what they are worried about, what they want for Samuel and for us as a family. Jo-ann and I are incredibly proud parents of three children who inspire us endlessly despite the challenges that they have each faced.

Sharing beyond home

Phone calls to a few, facebook updates, a few twitter messages, the message about Samuel and his circumstances has spread far and wide including to many places around the world. How far and wide this network of people extends is an indicator of the impact that Samuel’s life has already had.

Thank You

We are really thankful for all of the messages of love and support that so many people have already sent us, and continue to send us. They are too numerous to thank individually without taking time away from other important things that we need to focus on. So please take this as our thanks to you for your love and support (of which we are sure we will need plenty of over the coming days/weeks).