Exploring Resilience via Lifes Burning Issues

Tag: happiness (Page 9 of 9)

Child-like enthusiasm – are you living with it?

Enthusiasm

I had a great moment this morning taking my 9-year-old off to her second day of school for the year. We were walking to school, holding hands and taking about school this year, and who her new teacher was, sharing a joke or two on the way.

Yesterday they started in their old classes, and were then told which class they were going into and who their teacher was for this year, and then they got to find out who was in their class with them.

So part of our conversation related to who was in her class and which of her friends were in her new class. After listing the friends in her class she then said ” but that doesn’t matter, there are a few people I know in the new class, but the one’s I don’t know I’ll get to know quickly, then I’ll start playing with them as well and I’ll have a whole new bunch of friends”

We got to school, she said hello to the regular bunch of kids I know and then immediately said hello to a whole bunch of kids that I did not know. She came back over to sit with me and said “that’s so and so and they are in my class”.

This was such a revelation. My nine-year old is a pretty anxious child and worries a lot about things (a lot of it driven by her experiences with her brother… see here for the background), but she does things with enthusiasm.

It set me thinking about how many of us live our lives often anxious about a range of things and how we will fit in a new environment like a new job, a new social setting etc and how we can often let that interfere with how we go about getting on with it, and how it probably limits a bunch of opportunities.

I was impressed by my 9 year olds enthusiasm for getting stuck into her new environment and being committed to getting to know people and making new friends.

How many of us have been reluctant to leave comments on a new blog, or introduce ourselves to someone new in the blogging community etc?

My 9-year-old taught me another lesson this morning, that I hope she is teaching you as well….. we should live our lives with child-like enthusiasm!

So… child-like enthusiasm – are you living with it?  Where has it got you, or what are you afraid of? Let me know by leaving your comments… my 9-year-old would love to hear the stories.

this posts image by Evil Erin @ Flickr

What is the key to happiness?

(the Buddhist Path to Simplicity by Christina Feldman)
Happiness by sciondriver

Happiness by sciondriver

What is the key the happiness?

Wouldn’t most people pay millions for the answer to that question?

Quite a while ago I found this short story about the key happiness ( in the Buddhist Path to Simplicity by Christina Feldman).

A zen master was once asked “what is the key the happiness?” He answered “good judgement”, “How do I gain good judgement?” he was questioned, “experience” was the reply.

“How then do I get experience?” the student further probed, “Bad judgement” were his final words.

As happy as the next person

I like to be as happy as the next person, but this story has been running around in my head for a while and it quite often pops up again when I am thinking about what I am doing and why.

 Like most of us I’ve really excerised my “bad judgement” muscle and have definitely developed quite a portfolio of “experience”, and spent time wandering about some of this experience and what it means.

Which camp do you build with your experience?

When doing this we have a choice and people tend to broken into two camps. Those who look at their experiences and dwell on them worrying about what could have been, or what they think should have been and then expending a lot of unneccessary energy on regret or reliving the experience in a negative fasion.

The other camp is those who reflect on the experience, realise that nothing you can do is going to change the circumstances that led to the experience, nothing is going to change the actual experience but the experience contains a wealth of information that can help you make things different in the future.

I think the first camp is going to continue to experience “bad judgement”  and sell themselves short on finding the key to happiness because they continue to cling to the past and what was, whilst the second camp by focusing on the the lessons learned and the future,  focusing on what is, and what could be, are exercising their “good judgement” muscle and working hard on using the key to happiness.

Working out your happiness muscle

Like all muscles if we excercise them they get stronger, and more resilient over time. If we don’t excercise them they atrophy and lose mass, becoming less effective.

I try spend a good deal of my time working to exercise the “good judgement” muscle in order to experience more happiness.

What about you? what are/were the experiences that taught you good judgement, and which “muslce group” are you building up every day? and what are your tips for learning “good judgement”?

Let’s talk about it.

Quite a while ago I found this short story about the key happiness
A zen master was once asked “what is the key the happiness?” He answered “good judgement”,
“How do I gain good judgement?” he was questioned, “experience” was the reply. “How then
do I get experience?” the student further probed, “Bad judgement” were his final words.
I like to be as happy as the next person, but this story has been running around in my head
for a while and it quite often pops up again when I am thinking about what I am doing and why.
Like most of us I’ve really excerised by “bad judgement” muscle and have definitely developed quite
a portfolio of “experience”, and spent time wandering about some of this experience.
When doing this we have a choice and people tend to broken into two camps. Those who look at the
experience and dwell on it worrying about what could have been, or what should have been and then
expending a lot of unneccessary energy on regret or reliving the experience in a negative fasion.
The other camp is those who reflect on the experience, realise that nothing you can do is going
to change the circumstances that led to the experience, nothing is going to change the actual experience
but the experience contains a wealth of information that can make things different in the future.
I think the first camp is going to continue to experience “bad judgement” because they continue
to cling to the past and what was, whilst the second camp by focusing on the the lessons learned and the future
focusing on what is, and what could be, and they are exercising their “good judgement” muscle.
Like all muscles if we excercise them they get stronger, and more resilient over time. If we don’t excercise them
they atrophy and lose mass, becoming less effective.
I spend a good deal of my time working to exercise the “good judgement” muscle in order to experience
more happiness.
What about you? what are/were the experiences that taught you good judgement, and which “muslce group” are
you building up every day? and what are your tips for learning “good judgement”?
Let’s talk about it.
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