Exploring Resilience via Lifes Burning Issues

Category: Uncategorized (Page 10 of 19)

The slow boat to China – or cruising through 20 years of Marriage

Mick and Jo

Who are these young people… Me and my beautiful wife back in 1993

Twenty Years

The second of October 1993 to the second of October 2013…A time to celebrate twenty years of being married. Twenty years that feels like it has been a long time, but twenty years that also feels like it has gone by in the blink of an eye.

Twenty years that have been filled with highs, lows and everything in-between. Twenty years that have given us three beautiful children, that have filled us with joy.. and the inevitable sadness of Samuel’s situation.

Twenty years with Jo-ann who is probably expecting me to make a crack about the possibility of being paroled for murder (twice over) by now…[or as a friend put it more politely the other day.. day years married to you Michael, I’m sure she thinks about murder and being paroled every day] …. but no… I’m more romantic than that 🙂 (shhhh stop laughing Jo-ann)

Taking the slow boat to china…

I’m sure you have all heard the term “on a slow boat to China”.. in general use it means something that takes a long time is very slow and may never reach it’s destination. The term also has a few cultural references to romance too with a 1948 hit song by Frank Loesser that has been revised from time to time by the likes of Peggy Lee and Bing Crosby, Bette Midler, Ella Fitzgerald, Dean Martin and many others.

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In the romantic sense the term is about wanting to spend as much time as possible with the one that one love…..  and the reality is that I’d be happy to do twenty years with Jo-ann all over again.. and I look forward to spending the next twenty on another ride on the “slow boat to china”… because who really knows that the destination of life is, or when we’ll get there?

But….I’m also playing on words a little…..

The symbolism of twenty years

A twentieth wedding anniversary is represented by China….no not the country! Gifts of fine china are the traditional gift associated with a twentieth wedding anniversary.

It is meant to symbolizes the beautiful, elegant, and delicate nature of your love for one another over 20 years (However, there was no way I was going out to get Jo-ann a nice china dinner set…)

Jo-ann is one who likes symbolism and some of the associated tradition and the romance that it represents … so my gift to Jo-ann for our twentieth wedding anniversary  is this…

Doulton Forever

A Royal Doulton, Fine China Figurine called FOREVER.

I think it is a nice blend of the tradition of China as a twentieth anniversary gift, a reminder of our wedding day (and how damn young we looked!), and that we are on the slow boat to China forever…..

My anniversary message to Jo-ann.

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I Love You… through thick and thin, through the highs and lows. I’m glad you’ve shared the last twenty years with me, I look forward to sharing another twenty with you….[and just so you don’t think I’m getting too mushy… just remember… you’re stuck with me 🙂 ]

 

Checking in for check out and check up…

Our seven and a half-year roller-coaster ride since Samuel’s accident has had moments of intense highs and intense lows, but there is one constant throughout the whole time……

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Jo-ann lives the experience twenty-four hours a day, seven days a week, with very little down time to help recharge her batteries. I am lucky that I get a change of scenery through going to work, foundation meetings etc etc, but for Jo-ann it is a constant.

I really admire how much Jo-ann has put up with and how she continues to get on with it, no matter how much it hurts her.. and it hurts a LOT ….

She’s been told to check out….

Check out of home that is…

As things have happened for Samuel we have been in regular touch with Bear Cottage and really appreciate their continued help in discussing things with us and it remains a comfort, knowing that they are there to support us and ready to have Samuel and the family back at a moments notice.

In their usual fashion they have made some space available for Samuel and Jo-ann.

Jo-ann and Samuel are checking in…..

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Jo-ann and Samuel are checking into Bear Cottage today to give Jo-ann a few days where she really does not have to focus on the needs of the whole family, can leave most of Samuel’s care to the wonderful staff and really concentrate on unwinding and recharging.

Samuel gets a check up

While Jo-ann unwinds, it is also a good opportunity to have a check up on where Samuel is up to.

We see Samuel day in day out, yes we see changes and we notice things, however the Bear Cottage staff will have a few days to watch him, catch up on what is happening for him and assess where they think he is up to. That will be useful to us the staff will have an update appreciation of Samuel’s condition and be more attuned to him when we make those phone calls saying HELP… what do we do now.

The girls get stuck with Dad.

There has to be worse fates…. (but you’ll have to ask the girls what they might be :-] ) but the girls are stuck at home with Dad so they can continue to go to school… might have to come up with a LONG work list them…

 

 

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